Why Does Everything Stress Me?

Often times we get overwhelmed by little things, menial tasks, things that we are not even going to remember two or three years from now. We start letting these little things stress and upset us, and take over our days or weeks. Once we recognise ourselves having reached this point, it means its time to take a few steps back and take a look at the big picture again. The moment you start looking at the small details without remembering what the whole canvas is about, you start to get distracted and you lose sight of what’s truly important and ‘worthy’ to get stressed (concerned) over. When you prioritise the small things over the big ones, you are going to lose sight of both!

‘Focus’ is the key word in this post. We need not lose sight of what’s important at all times. That does not mean that life should be all work and no play; it simply means that even when we are relaxing and taking time to ourselves, it is important to not do anything that would jeopardise our focus on our bigger goals. I believe that even enjoying ourselves should have some ‘limits’ in itself. We should not do things blindly, without purpose. If the purpose is relaxing or having fun, that’s great, but still, there are boundaries that should not be crossed. I, personally, think of it this way: If in a few years, what I do right now will fill me with remorse and regret, then it’s probably not a good decision. I want to be very clear here and minimise misunderstandings as much as I can; having fun, relaxing, doing spontaneous things it’s great, and it’s something I would encourage a lot. My point is that, there are some things that are unnecessary to do or try.

As human beings, our intelligence allows us to be able to distinguish between good and bad decisions. It’s either as simple as a ‘gut feeling’ or as complicated as an analysis we make, weighing the outcomes of our actions and then making a decision. Either way, almost every time we make a decision, deep deep down, we know if it’s gonna be a good route or a bumpy one we’re consciously choosing for ourselves. In this state of ambivalence, there are two routes we take, and that really depends on a person’s character. The first thing we might do is to choose the ‘safe’ thing and prevent ourselves from making a rash or spontaneous decision, in the wish to prevent any possible negative outcome(s). We stay within our comfort zone, keep our eye on the clear goal(s) we’ve set and don’t do anything too risky that we think might jeopardise that. A second way to handle an ambiguous situation is to take a risk and do something completely ‘out of character’, thinking that either that might help us achieve our goal by being bolder and more daring, or no longer keeping focus.

Whatever the decision, the outcome depends on you throughout time; the way we handle things differs and so do our paths and actions. When we are able to see the big picture, even the smallest of decisions become easier; it is clearer as to what we need to focus our attention and energy on, and life becomes that much simpler in this sense. So, when in a doubtful situation, it is always helpful to ask ourselves, “How is what I’m doing/choosing, going to affect my future relations, performances (school/work), self-image, etc.?” Many people say, “Live in the moment, don’t concern yourself about the future”, and that makes a lot of sense to me; but having goals and visible ‘finish lines’ help keep us motivated and having a clear, concrete, earthly purpose…it helps drive us throughout the years. Setting goals and deciding what we want to be important for us is a whole other topic that requires a post on itself, and I will be discussing that in the future as well, but for now let’s just try to focus on understanding what we need to stress ourselves with and what’s really important for us ;)

‘Till next time…